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If you're reading this, chances are you may have a toxic or narcissistic mother in your life. She may be your mother, your mother-in-law, or your grandmother. You often feel as though something is wrong when you are in this person's presence, though you can't quite put your finger on it. She tends to make you feel tired and emotionally drained when you are around her.
Narcissistic and toxic mothers are often injured in their childhoods by their own stunted emotional development. In order to fully develop into a healthy adult, we need a very nurturing and emotionally validating environment. Toxic and narcissistic mothers often grow up without that nurturing. They have jumped through hoops and tailored themselves to others around them. They have been invited to be a part of mind games, lies, and manipulation. They may have been told repeatedly that they weren't wanted.
Narcissistic and toxic mothers can be very damaging to those around them. They have been often violated and hurt by others themselves. They see the world around them as being cruel, and so they take a defensive stance against others. They bore easily and struggle to keep their own emotions in check. For this reason they seem to enjoy being in a constant state of drama in the relationships around them.
They are often experiencing great sadness, shame, guilt, and depression in their inner cores due to a lack of healing the things that happened to them. They need others to save them from themselves. They need others to provide a constant state of interaction with them in order to distract them from the pain they are feeling inside. They have to project their pain onto others to share it because they cannot find healthy and meaningful ways in which to deal with it themselves.
- Sales Rank: #68950 in Audible
- Published on: 2015-10-19
- Format: Unabridged
- Original language: English
- Running time: 63 minutes
Most helpful customer reviews
5 of 6 people found the following review helpful.
Another quick but potent read
By Oath
I liked the numbered list of signs. It was a painful book to read. I recognized a ton of signs as being that of a parent, however...the book handicaps itself by entitling itself about MOTHERS. All and I mean all of the familiar signs in the book were instantly relatable to being about narcissistic fathers. All of them. In my case it felt creepy and off putting because my mother is not narcissistic....but my father certainly had a majority of the signs in this book.
I feel these kind of books end abruptly and although they hit the bullseye on diagnosing NPD in others, they tend to be light on how to heal from such abuse
I also, due to experience, reject that silence and a straight face are potent tools for responding to narcissistic episodes. To the contrary, it makes victim appear weak and stoic. I much prefer a response of, "Grow up." Or, "That is not is not even worth responding to. " Or my own personal favorite, "Your father must have messed you up bad to make you get pleasure in hurting me " That one was a shoulder dropper and he instantly lowered his head and walked away.
Still, the info this book did provide was relatable and eerily familiar. Thanks for writing it!!!
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
Now to tell my children
By scott morris
This really opened my eyes to my children's captivity. Excellent book for my now married children. It reads like an autobiography.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
My husbands mother.
By Cam
If you have an overbearing mother-in-law or mother,this is a book for you. This was an easy read and very informative. I have seen many of these signs with my mother-in-law. I would often discuss the things she did with my friends because I would wonder if others would feel the same way I did if someone treated them this way. I wondered if I was just over reacting or just jealous. It took me awhile to realize it wasn't me, that she would act this way with anyone he married.
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